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Our kids are fat! I felt deeply guilty when the government recently lambasted the children of our land over their obesity. Inactivity is the culprit and I took that personally. Kids learn from their parents and we of the driving generation have set the way. I guess.
Can fitness and driving co-exist? Not until now, Bugsy, but thanks to my new Drive-o-metrics Program of exercise and physical culture, we can all get into shape while we use our vehicles. Our kids follow our model, they become svelte and we all get to split the money that the government is pouring into Phys Ed teachers.
Seemingly at cross-purposes, our goal here is to modify driving so it adds to your daily workout regimen. The good news is that winter is upon us. Take two windshield washer jugs. Each is four litres, roughly four kilos (yes, 10 pounds). Take one in each hand and you're ready for the bicep curls. See kids, my bone mass is increasing just by lifting these ... omigawd ... Dad are you all right?
Got a seat that reclines? Tilt it back to do crunches as you wait for the light to change. Fifty a day will keep those abs gleaming. Holding one of those antifreeze jugs out the driver's side window and the other over the passenger seat (oops, excuse me honey did I put that jug in your face?) and you can do fly lifts, conditioning your arms and accelerating your heart rate while you wait at the Gardiner on-ramp.
You needn't invest in expensive exercise equipment; your vehicle has everything you need built right in. Use the tailgate for tricep dips. Step out of the car and lift the back bumper. This is like getting Bally Matrix free. If you are able to lift the back end of the vehicle off the pavement, you may have over-conditioned. Have a pizza and relax.
IT'S YOGA TIME
My Yoga Online is a Canadian site that takes Yoga out of the ashram and into your life, or in this case into your car. Pull over in front of a large office building, fire up your laptop and "borrow" some wireless connection. It's yoga time.
The seated positions are naturals for the driver and passengers.
The Sukhasana pose opens the hips, lengthens the spine and promotes groundedness and inner calm. The Navasana (Boat Pose) strengthens hips, thighs and abdominal muscles and stimulates the kidneys. What could be better for your mind and body? You might have some problems reaching the gas and brake while in the Boat Pose, but that is a small price for physical enlightenment.
Hop out of the car and do a "plank" on the roof or on the sidewalk. People may look askance, but their looks quickly turn to admiration as they realize you are working toward the well being of the next generation.
Did I mention inner peace? Road rage vanishes in the process of meditation. Padma, your online instructor, will keep you from taking on that massively built delivery truck driver. Complete your drive filled with self-knowledge in place of a flattened nose and black eye.
It's diet too. Keep a variety of nutritious produce in the back seat so you can set an example for the kids by following the Canada Food Guide. Your car may have some cauliflower detritus ground into the carpet, but that's a small price to pay for balanced nutrition. Get lots of liquids -- three litres of pure water a day plus a glass of milk for calcium, a glass of vegetable cocktail to increase your lycopenes and a mug of soya drink just because. By complementing your Tim Horton's double double in this way you will diversify your dietary input plus add kinetic exercise by sprinting constantly to the Esso station washroom.
